In a stunning revelation, newly uncovered letters expose a deeply personal relationship between Jackie Kennedy, the beloved First Lady, and Robert McNamara, a pivotal figure in her husband’s administration as Secretary of Defense.
According to the Daily Mail, these letters illuminate an intimate bond that began in 1962, intensified after President John F. Kennedy’s assassination in 1963, and offered Jackie emotional solace amid personal and public turmoil.
Jackie Kennedy, often seen as America’s elegant princess, was renowned for her grace and cultural influence during her time in the White House.
Her husband, President John F. Kennedy, however, was widely known for his extramarital affairs with prominent figures like Marilyn Monroe, which Jackie navigated with poised discretion.
Amid this backdrop, a surprising connection emerged with McNamara, a man publicly viewed as a cold, analytical mind obsessed with war statistics, earning him the nickname “the Brain” in political circles.
Their story began on Feb. 9, 1962, at a White House event where Jackie and McNamara shared a lively dance, performing the Twist until the early hours. While JFK was absent for an hour, fueling gossip, society columnist Betty Beale noted the captivating display, describing it as “rhythmic, fun and peppy.” The following week, Jackie crafted a playful Valentine’s Day collage for McNamara, using clippings about their dance, delivered in an envelope bearing the White House crest.
Days after the party, Jackie sent snapshots of their dance, humorously mentioning “executive privilege” to shield the images from conservative critics. Their bond grew more serious as Jackie took an interest in McNamara’s role during the Cuban Missile Crisis in October 1962, a tense period of international conflict. On Oct. 25, she penned a heartfelt note of support, expressing gratitude for his efforts and sharing a lighthearted anecdote about a colleague found asleep near a desk.
By Feb. 14, 1963, McNamara reciprocated with a handmade Valentine’s card, prompting Jackie to respond with a heart-adorned note on official stationery. That spring, as JFK delivered his iconic “Ich bin ein Berliner” speech, a pregnant Jackie watched it alongside McNamara in the White House private quarters. The next evening, they dined at a quiet Georgetown restaurant, Salle du Bois, a moment of respite amid their high-profile lives.
Jackie later thanked McNamara for gifting her a worn copy of a book on mysticism, a gesture reflecting their shared intellectual interests. However, McNamara’s wife, Margaret, known as Margy, grew visibly upset by their closeness, especially during the Georgetown dinner when she struggled to reach him. Soon after, Jackie endured heartbreak with the birth and tragic loss of her son, Eric, within a day, marking a somber chapter in her life.
Their bond deepened after JFK’s assassination on Nov. 22, 1963, in Dallas, when Jackie specifically requested McNamara’s presence during the difficult hours that followed. He arrived at the hospital by 7:45 p.m., staying with her until they returned to the White House at 4:25 a.m., providing unwavering support. McNamara later offered to purchase the Georgetown home where Jackie and JFK once lived, a thoughtful gesture to ease her pain.
In the years after, their friendship persisted through discreet meetings in New York at La Caravelle, often when Margy was away. During a Vietnam trip, McNamara received a stuffed tiger from a foreign leader, which he passed on to Jackie’s children, Caroline and John Jr. Jackie saw him as a potential advocate for peace in Vietnam, though she occasionally expressed frustration over his perceived inaction.
One evening in her Manhattan apartment overlooking Central Park, after discussing poetry, Jackie’s emotions erupted over the Vietnam War’s toll. McNamara recalled her striking his chest in anguish, pleading with him to end the violence, a moment of raw vulnerability. As he later reflected, “She became so tense that she could hardly speak.”
Authors Philip and William Taubman suggest their connection was more spiritual than physical, rooted in a shared yearning for companionship beyond their marriages. They described McNamara as a rare figure in the administration, showing genuine respect and empathy toward women, qualities Jackie valued deeply. For her, he was a trusted confidant, brilliant yet humble, offering solace away from the relentless public scrutiny of her life.
After Jackie married Aristotle Onassis in 1968, her exchanges with McNamara grew formal and sparse, signaling a shift in their dynamic. Years later, Margy passed away in 1981, and McNamara remarried before his death in 2009, while Jackie died in 1994. In 1993, she sent him a final note, affectionately calling him her “shining knight,” a poignant nod to their enduring connection.